My Senior year of high school came and went without much fanfare. I had a small graduation party at my mother's. I stayed up all night for the first time with my grandmother to study and cram for my only Regents class, Business Law.It paid off, as I passed, and got my diploma. I continued to date that young man Mark.
Getting along with my Mother was a different story. Maybe I felt resentment toward her.. Maybe it was hormones... but my mother and I had arguments.. nearly every day. I am a lover usually not a fighter.. So this really surprised me about myself. My mother was a name caller.. you know the kind... the person who has fights and may not really have a real leg to stand on... in the subject of the fight.. so they decided to call you names.... most of which don't accurately describe you.. but they make it sound so mean and hurtful.. that you still want to defend yourself. One afternoon... My mother was saying mean things to me... and one particular thing she said hit me like a bug on a moving cars windshield, it sent me in a rage... so I pushed her. She pushed me back and I lost my footing landing back first. She quickly sat on top of me, as if she were a professional WWF wrestler.. and she began to choke me...So I did the only thing I could do... I kneed ed her in the back and elbowed her in the chest.. NOT to bad for a novice wrestler huh??? It's not funny at all now or then.. but it's what happened.. OH, what ensued next ....
I heard a loud pop and my mom began to yell an wail... as I heard this loud sound I pushed her off me and took off running up the stairs and out the front door.
I felt my heart pounding as I ran out of the front door and down the long road... towards the highway.. and at the highway was a deli. I picked up the pay phone and made a collect call to my grandmother. I kept looking behind me up the hill, to see if my mother was chasing me. She was not. I waited at the deli for my grandmother to drive from her country home to the deli.. to rescue me.
My grandmother arrived to save me and we drove off... Not looking back.. I never ended up going back to my unicorn room... My grandmother would go back for my clothes and later for my items.. I was afraid my mom would toss out all my things... but she did not.
My mother and I did not speak for a year after this ...
My sickening spin on the merry go round that was living with my mother would come to an end. I decided I wanted to get an apartment... and try life alone... So I began looking for a job. I had spend much time in high school volunteering at the Presbyterian church working as a teachers aide in a pre-school setting.. I loved the 4 and 5 year olds.. they were able to draw such great pictures and tell very imaginative stories... I decided I wanted to go to community college and be a early childhood educator.. Thus my thoughts and experiences as I got ready for post-college.( sorry I have no pictures this week, my scanner is on the blitz again)
3 comments:
That's awful. I can't imagine fighting like that with either parent.
that makes me feel so sad, but thankful you had your grandmother to turn to.
I am happy you had your grandmother; I gather your Mom was a child when she had you, she wasn't able to be anything other than your sister.
I am sorry you had to endure this type of emotional pain~xXx
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