Bare

I am not a eternal optimist... never have been. I don't look at the world by looking through rose colored glasses.. and maybe I should.. I have my health.. for the most part.. a beautiful son... and a marriage and a home... but I am NOT happy. See I said it... My outlook doesn't fit me like a well fitting suit. It's too tight.... and all the wrong colors. I just feel alone and sad... like no one understand me for me... I feel Bare.
  I know who wants to read about dismal perspectives here or on facebook. I understand... but I am trying to heave this depression out of my hand like a game of hot potato... and I can't ...I am looking for something to fuel me with a warm bowl of positive soup.... but my bowl is still bare.
 This fun picture of my son.. worked for a few minutes..

 I got this great pumpkin at a garage sale.. and my son has just started Karate... He isn't sure if he likes it.. cause he has only been to three classes.. and he is wondering.. where his yellow belt is?

The movie bridesmaids came out.. I was really looking forward to a silly ridiculous comedy to have me escape..... if only for 2 hours... so I invited a few people over for a screening of the movie.. and I made cool printables from Andersruff .... 



 My camera broke a while back.. and we went to good will and bought another for 80.00 and that broke last week... and now .. i am using some camera my husband had.... and the pictures it takes are horrible... 

I gave out E.L.F  lip gloss... 

 

The prizes... the movie... E.L.F makeup case with make-up and party lite candle...

I thought it would make me feel better..a funny movie and my friends around me. IT did not take the bait.. it's still here... that bare...feeling.
I feel like I have hiked up a large hill and I am so hungry and excited that at the top I can rest and sit down... and eat some apples... as the top has a big orchard.
but.. when I reach the top... the entire orchard is bare... nothing to eat... and no where to sit... just mud.

"Let us learn to appreciate there will be times when the trees will be bare, and look forward to the time when we may pick the fruit." Anton Chekhov

I am looking forward to the time I don't feel bare... but I am not so sure...about the wait.