Free 28 Day Holiday Challenge

Free 28 Day Holiday Challenge
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Friday, February 11, 2011

void of color

I am not sure if it's the blues that I get every winter from lack of sunlight.. but....My daily walks have not happened. My spirit and my blog has lost it's color. I know darkness can be good and you need to embrace a little dark so you can see a brighter light. I am in a dark place..artistically and mentally. I know ebbs and flow are necessary...
but I have always been creative and a bit artistic it has been an integral part of my life. As a child, I was always drawing or painting.. I never paint or draw now. Art and creating fill a void in my heart. Written word fills that void too...  making food, crafts or writing on my blog usually put color back in my world.I can stack my hope, fear and wonder on top of  it's self... I hope it doesn't topple over.
I have been down a path of teaching but life sent me a detour... and I walked down the path of mother and  now there is a new fork in the road..But the side I took was full of mud and muck and I have waded in it.... and I feel I may not make it to the other side. Can I create my way out of it?

It's hard to know if you are headed on the right path, moving in the right direction, doing the right thing. I am pondering this ? I am sure I will know the answer when I get there. It's all about choices isn't it?
I am looking for signs....
a map?
  I want to feel important ... I want to be able to create.. I want to feel balanced and loved.

I want to see a color other than gray.... I want to see color again.
I want to feel those things during months with an R.

3 comments:

Rachel R. said...

I have a tough time with this too since I work night shift, and often feel I'm missing out on daylight and fresh air on the nights that I work and have to sleep during the day.

Sorry if this is unsolicited - it's just the nurse in me reaching out - but have you considered light therapy during the winter months?

Arlee Bird said...

I think it's natural to have up times and be in the doldrums at others. This is what gives us color, shades, and nuances. If we stayed the same all the time we'd probably be pretty boring.
You're just being normal. That's the way I see it.
I'm so happy that you're signed up for the A to Z Challenge again. You contributed so much last year.


Lee
Tossing It Out and the Blogging From A to Z April Challenge 2011

Ella said...

You can create a new path, start small, take baby steps and find time everyday to do something creative, even if it is color with your son.
You can bake, write a note, use your stamps and make a small index card, put it on the fridge. Your heART needs it~ xXx

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