Free 28 Day Holiday Challenge

Free 28 Day Holiday Challenge
Slow down this holiday season- click on the snow to find out more about this challenge

Thursday, January 6, 2011

beware of Chronophages

So I have been thinking of how to put some calm in my life.... I have a lot of chaos... from my current living situation and I have conflicts with my son... I want to beware of chronophages. ( it is a word that in french means- time consuming..). I want less chaos.. and more calm...chaos in time consuming calm is not.



So words that have come to mind are: yes C words-and lots of them.

Chaos
Conflict
Crave
control
Clinical
concern


I love my son. I adore him. I would lay down my life for him. but my son is hard to be with... much of the time. As a mother no one wants to hear this from me. As a mother I thought my heart was so big... I would never feel this.. I want inner calm. I want self-restraint. I want the conflicts to stop reaching a point of survival instincts and to just stay maternal instincts. Am I making sense to anyone? I want a magical mother's heart.




I know many ADD adults and children crave risk,conflict,they have rampant anxiety....
I am trying very hard this 2011... to be calm.. when dealing with my son's impulsivity and his need for instant gratification. I want to be calm when he says he is not going to school.and when he stages a revolt daily. I want him to learn coping skills. My husband never sees the hard work I have done with him, or the calm I keep for 40 minutes or longer about a certain task or demand my son has made.. He seems to come home when I am frothing and look like the mean mom, and my son looks like the victim... crying and sad. I know special needs children require much attention.. and they can break up families. I know the statistics.. Young adults with attention deficit disorder have 4 times as many car accidents as those who aren't affected. 5 times the rate of suicide attempts, and 10 times as many teen pregnancies. I know they are more than twice as likely to be arrested, and upt o 3 times as likely to abuse alcohol and drugs... see my battle. see my concern????





I want my new words to be
Calm
Carry on
Caring







Toni Morrison says,"The best gift a mother can give her child is to light up when he/she enters the room."



this is what I need to do.. to fill my son's self-esteem.. to try to see him in his world.. I won't let him be spoiled or treat me or anyone poorly or rudely but I must show him my love with out yelling so .. once again my motto for 20111 is Stay calm and carry on.

4 comments:

Callie said...

Love your blog!

Betty Manousos @ CUT AND DRY said...

Dropping by from Sits to say hi!
Lovely blog!

So Very Domestic said...

Sweet blog! You'll get through it. I had this issue with my first child when he was about 4. Now he's 10 and no one would believe me if I told him he rivaled Curious George years ago!

Ellen aka Ella said...

Lisa,
I can see your challenges, but you as a MOM, need coping tools for you.
Time out for you to regroup and come back into the situation, calm. I use to have a box on top of my fridge. I read about this somewhere. It was a stress box, I had one of those squishy balls to squeeze, peppermint candle or chapstick...peppermint calms me. Tea bags, no caffeine, calm types and a few cut out joke clippings.
And a few photos that would always remind me of some precious moments.
It only takes a few minutes, if you can't get away to regroup.
Take Care~
xXx

Fountain of Health

Fountain of Health
Welcome

Trying to lose weight and gain more energy?

how far have you come to visit?

My Blog List

parent/ blogs

vegan blogs

A.D.H.D.

plant based blogs

Blog Archive

Labels

letters of love from china (5) Are you in a book club? (3) Higland NY (3) andersruff.etsy.com (3) death (3) elf on the shelf (3) mothers day (3) muffin tin monday (3) photography (3) tablescape (3) 15 top books (2) Ashley (2) Letter S is the A to Z challenge (2) adoption (2) ashley sisk (2) books (2) caffeine (2) cinco de mayo (2) del.icio.us (2) depression (2) easter (2) eggs (2) emotions (2) facebook (2) food (2) friends (2) gaining weight (2) gingerbread decorating party (2) help (2) journaling (2) kindergarten (2) lavender ice cream (2) male end of the year gifts (2) parties (2) pink and green thursday (2) questions (2) scavenger hunt (2) summer wedding (2) weight watchers (2) #2 (1) 10 best things about my christmas (1) 1st in a series from A-z. (1) 20 minute meals (1) 200 follower (1) 2011 best blogs (1) 5 minutes peace (1) 5 question friday from fivecookedhalos (1) 5 top books (1) 504 main (1) ADHD (1) ARuba (1) Alicia Quintana (1) Alzheimers (1) Asparagus (1) Benmarl winery (1) Between YOU and ME (1) Chuang Yen Monastery (1) DO you have an elf on your shelf? (1) Dear Mrs. LaRue (1) Demetia (1) E.L.F make up (1) Escoffier (1) Farm market food (1) Father (1) Fawn (1) Fine arts (1) Forgiveness (1) Giveaway MAY (1) Happy for no reason (1) Highlandcafe (1) Hoboken (1) Jan (1) Jones farm (1) Leave me a comment please (1) March (1) Mark Teague (1) May 1st (1) Millbrok (1) Miss. Dutchess county Pageant (1) Mommy's piggy tales (1) NAPA valley (1) NJ (1) Nitendo wii giveaway (1) Oblong Millerton NY (1) Patrick's day clues and fun (1) Pier 1... and tasting party (1) Post office in pre-k (1) Proust (1) Pysanky (1) Salmon (1) St. pat's lunch (1) Steve Ciancio Auto body (1) Umami (1) Vassar Collge (1) Victoria Martorano (1) WIN (1) Westpoint Ny (1) Xenium (1) Y is for (1) You'll be in my heart (1) Yummee cupcake cafe (1) Zinfindel (1) a jornal for jordan (1) adhdmomma (1) adventures in bento making (1) and name of Lisa (1) ann landers (1) apiphobia (1) artistic (1) aspargaus primavera (1) authors (1) autism (1) back tatoo (1) backyard flock (1) bake me a wish (1) barnes and noble (1) beach (1) bed and breakfast (1) bento boxes (1) bird (1) bisphenol-A free cans (1) black pumpkin (1) blog (1) blog hop (1) blog party (1) bloom into fashion (1) book club holilday party (1) book fair (1) book review (1) bree tanner (1) bride and groom corpse (1) bridesmaids the movie girls not out night (1) bulletin board (1) bumble bee (1) cake boss (1) calm (1) camera (1) candy apples (1) canfield casino in congress park (1) carmel (1) carnival (1) cell phone use (1) chair (1) change your life (1) charlie smith (1) charming place (1) cheating (1) cheesecake (1) chicken coop (1) childhood (1) children's books (1) children's miracle network (1) chipmunks... (1) chocolate rabbits. (1) christmas tree farm (1) clean eating (1) coffe on the patio (1) conflicts with children who have adhd (1) confrontation (1) cookie swap (1) cookies (1) corsage t (1) country christmas (1) coupon parties (1) cousins (1) coyotes (1) creative cakes (1) creative charactes (1) crepes (1) cupcakes (1) dad (1) dali lama (1) dating (1) day 11 (1) day 12 (1) day 4 (1) day 8 (1) depressed. (1) diamonds (1) dip (1) dip and Quesedillas with mango sauce. (1) diryt dozen movies... alex cavanaugh (1) dogs (1) dopamine (1) dr.seuss (1) dragons (1) dressmaker (1) earrings (1) earth day (1) earth day books (1) edible flowers (1) egg dye (1) egg whites (1) elmo (1) enchantresses3 (1) erdajt (1) failure (1) fairies (1) fall and halloween literature... pinkoween for susan komen foundation (1) family (1) fashion (1) father's day (1) fathers day (1) feast of clams.. breakfast mornings (1) featured blogger (1) feed me book friday (1) finding healing (1) firefly lane (1) fireproof (1) first time i feel like this at fall (1) fiveminutesformom.com (1) flip flops (1) flying fishbone resteraunt (1) folding laundry (1) friday follow (1) friendships (1) frog umbrella (1) frogs (1) fun (1) furture (1) games for holiday parties (1) gerald mcdermott (1) gerber days (1) get up early (1) gift (1) gift giving to hostess (1) giveaway contest (1) gnome costume (1) google (1) grab the button (1) hagan das (1) happiness project (1) harvest salad. (1) heartsmakefamilies.com (1) helicopter moms (1) herb (1) holding a boy back... retention (1) holiday fun with kids (1) honey bees (1) horton (1) household things (1) hudson valley (1) hummingbird feeder (1) insect lore (1) island getaway (1) italian bees (1) j is for jewerly (1) jenny mcCarthy (1) jill murphy (1) jornaling (1) kat von d (1) kelle hampton (1) kellys korner (1) kids food (1) ladybug unit (1) last letter day 14 (1) lava cake (1) lavender wants (1) leaves (1) lego party for a 5 year old. (1) lemonade stand (1) letter to son (1) letterboxing with kids (1) letters (1) life expectancy Dean Koontz (1) life is a special occasion (1) life renewal (1) locurto (1) lost (1) lost phone (1) love Dare (1) lunch ideas (1) m and m (1) making the rounds with Oscar (1) mama kats losin it (1) martha stewart (1) mascarpone cheese (1) matzo ball soup... (1) meme (1) memorial day flowers (1) merritt books store (1) metropolitan museum of art (1) miche purse (1) midday escapades (1) milk carton houses (1) miniature doll house items sold in sets (1) moca (1) mojito cake (1) mojitos (1) mom's tea for cheers and tears (1) mother day tea (1) mother dealing with adhd (1) mother poetry (1) mothers (1) muffin tin lunch (1) my first vlog (1) my son loved them (1) nap porch (1) nectar (1) negative thinking (1) nests (1) neurofibromatosis (1) newburgh mother (1) nicholas sparks (1) nursing home (1) ocean grove (1) ode to my son (1) olives (1) one2try (1) onion domes (1) ontario (1) open house (1) options (1) organize and then treat yourself (1) oscar the grouch project (1) owl (1) paint (1) part ideas (1) party favor (1) patricia pollaco (1) pennies for peace (1) perfection (1) perfection by julie metz (1) phil collins (1) pie (1) piggy Tales number 3 (1) pigmania (1) pigs (1) pinkprep (1) pirate party (1) pollen (1) pop-top craft (1) popcorn (1) portion control (1) pre-k (1) pros and cons (1) puddle jumper (1) pumpkins (1) putting your son on the school bus for the first time. (1) ramblings and photos (1) random dozen (1) read it forward (1) readin (1) recharge (1) reflections new year (1) rock climber (1) room by emma donoghue (1) root beer (1) santa cookies (1) santa shaped snack (1) sarah's key (1) scavenenger hunt (1) seeds (1) sharon CT (1) shrimp omelette (1) sinfully delicious (1) sits day (1) smmothie (1) sneaky chef (1) snowdays (1) snowman tablescape (1) songs of three islands (1) sounds (1) split rail christmas tree farm (1) st. LUcia (1) starbucks recycle boxes (1) stella and dot (1) steven robert ciancio (1) stones into schools (1) storm trooper (1) strawberry themed party (1) stroke of insight (1) summers end (1) sunflowers (1) surprise snowballs (1) swim suit (1) tablescape of houses (1) talent (1) target (1) tarzan (1) taste of home (1) tate buds (1) tatoo (1) taxi (1) teacher appreciation (1) team edward (1) teengager (1) teeth (1) thansgiving table (1) the birth (1) the help (1) thirsty thursday (1) three cups of tea (1) tiger woods (1) tiny treasures buisness (1) tomie de paola (1) tooth fairy (1) top 11 blogs with cooking (1) tradtions (1) trendy tree house photo contest (1) turtles (1) twee poppets (1) tween (1) twilight (1) usborne children's art book (1) van gogh (1) vera bradley (1) violin (1) vitamin K (1) vivian photograhy (1) void of color (1) warwick (1) wasabi mommy (1) water (1) we read some great books at lunch about this (1) webkinz (1) wedding fall (1) weight loss (1) weight watcher recipe for chervil (1) weight watcher recipes (1) whimsical (1) win it (1) wineries (1) wineries in NY (1) winter chowder (1) wizard of oz (1) wreath making party (1) writers workship (1) writing letters to your children (1) yellow (1) you tube (1) young love (1) your town tuesday (1)

Pages